Turning Pro

For some reason this post seems stuck on my fingertips and I'm finding it hard to write out, to send to the world at large knowing then that it is actually real. I handed my notice in at the rural supply store I work at which was a huge relief in its own right because I don't really enjoy being in sales, lack the killer instinct to close deals and I want to give everyone a discount which is nice for them but not for our bottom line. At the end of the day rumours started that my old boss was coming back and I could never work for her again, and I would have been ousted from the "acting" promotion I had been giving and I'm too poor to keep riding anyway it was clearly decision time.

All my life I have been absolutely horse mad to the point of obsession. I didn't run I cantered. My barbie games were based around the toy horses, and I have nearly always had a pony. I have noticed as I have grown up the friends I have ridden with have fallen to the wayside as life became more important and horses less so. And thats ok but unfortunately that has never happened to me. I get angry and sore if I don't get my riding time. I can just stare at a horse and almost drink them in. I love everything about them, even the cheeky yearling TB colt I'm teaching to lead/tie in return for satellite TV. I'll spend all day thinking of what training exercises, supplements, and bits of equipment I can use on the horses I am riding at the time to maximise their performance and comfort.

That being said my desire to ride is driven mostly by my competitive nature. I imagine I will always have horses in my life in one form or another, by now the desire to showjump is like a burning inside me. I want it so badly. I want to canter a good horse down to huge oxer and get that distance and just feel them explode under me. I love that feeling or just raw power that you get from showjumping. Don't get me wrong I like cross country but it scares the pants off of me. The derby was the first time I have jumped substantial cross country fences in about 6 years.

Eventing picture from looooooooong ago. Man I used to have big cajones! Anyway, back to the point I have thrown in my steady though relatively low income job and leaving my partner yet again in the pursuit of the saddle. Not that we are breaking up of course because he is a awesome guy and though he doesn't quite get it, he is happy for me to do what I have too. I'm moving back down the North Island to work with my friend whom is also an excellent grand prix rider to help her with her team. I'm sure a lot of shit picking is in my future but also lots of riding, a few break-ins and lots and lots of training. Connie comes as well of course. Like I could leave her behind! Iwill miss the rides in the forestry and the beach and I hope to be back and borrow a horse to hunt with Eastern Bay because its the best hunt ever, but otherwise its 2 and a half months of nothing but showjumpers until the competition season ends. I'm pretty excited about it, even though I will be poor and tired and taking part in one of the hardest industries ever.

I have done the 'right' thing for so long, steady job and income, getting the degree with honours etc, but it always comes back to the horse and I finally have the courage to go an have a run at my dream. Perhaps it will be a nightmare and I will hate it but if I don't try I'll never know and will always regret it I think. You only get to live once and maybe doing the dumb thing for a while is just what I need to do. So in two weeks I have my last day of work and then Connie and I move again to the next stage of life. And hey even if it doesn't work I'll learn heaps.

Kate who incidenty is in foal to Trumps yay!